9 Simple Ways To Incorporate Self Compassion This Year

9 Simple Ways To Incorporate Self Compassion This Year

January is obviously a popular time to set personal and professional goals for the year. While we fully support striving for growth, setting New Years resolutions can unintentionally be paired with harsh self-criticism when we don’t meet our own expectations. As humans, we are certainly capable of making mistakes – and if we can accept and make peace with that fact and double down on self-compassion, no matter the outcome, we will all be better off. By treating ourselves with kindness and understanding, we can create a strong foundation for meaningful, sustainable growth.

What Is Self-Compassion?

Self-compassion, a concept researched by Dr. Kristin Neff, involves treating ourselves with the same kindness, care, and support we would offer a close friend during difficult times. It has three main components:

  1. Self-Kindness (vs. Self-Judgment): Being warm and understanding toward ourselves when we’re struggling, rather than critical or judgmental.
  2. Common Humanity (vs. Isolation): Recognizing that everyone experiences setbacks, failures, and pain—it’s part of being human – and actually connects us.
  3. Mindfulness (vs. Overidentification): Being present with our emotions without suppressing or exaggerating them. Mindfulness helps us acknowledge our feelings without letting them define us.

Practicing self-compassion is not about being self-indulgent or avoiding accountability. Instead, it’s about building resilience, improving emotional well-being, and creating a healthier relationship with ourselves.

There are many benefits to self compassion. In fact, Neff’s research shows that people who incorporate self compassion are more likely to:

Why Self-Compassion Matters

It Improves Our Emotional Resilience

Life is filled with challenges – and self-compassion provides a cushion for managing them. When we respond to setbacks with kindness, we’re more likely to bounce back and try again. Research shows that people who practice self-compassion are less likely to experience anxiety and depression and more likely to maintain a positive outlook in the face of adversity.

It Reduces Perfectionism

Perfectionism often stems from a fear of failure and harsh self-judgment. Self-compassion helps to counter this by encouraging us to embrace imperfections and view mistakes as opportunities for learning. By letting go of the need to be perfect, we can focus on progress and enjoy the process.

It Enhances Our Relationships

When we treat ourselves with kindness, we’re more likely to extend that same kindness to others. Self-compassion fosters empathy and patience, which are key to building strong, supportive relationships. It also reduces the likelihood of burnout, helping us show up as our best selves for the people we care about.

It Boosts Our Motivation and Performance

Contrary to popular belief, being kind to ourselves doesn’t make us lazy or complacent. In fact, self-compassion can boost motivation by creating a safe environment for taking risks and pursuing goals. When we’re not paralyzed by fear of failure, we’re more likely to step out of our comfort zone and achieve meaningful success.

It Supports Our Physical Health

Self-compassion isn’t just good for our mental health; it can also improve our physical health. Studies have shown that people who practice self-compassion are more likely to engage in healthy behaviors like regular exercise, balanced eating, and adequate sleep. By treating our bodies with care, we set ourselves up for long-term well-being.

How to Practice Self-Compassion Daily

Incorporating self-compassion into your daily life doesn’t have to be complicated. Here are some simple yet effective ways to get started:

1. Talking to Ourselves Like a Friend

Sometimes we are not as nice to ourselves as we could be. If we pay attention to our inner dialogue, we can catch ourselves being overly critical, pause and reframe our thoughts. We can ask ourselves, “what would I say to a friend in this situation?” Chances are, we’d offer words of encouragement and understanding, rather than harsh criticism. It’s important for us to practice extending the same kindness to ourselves.

2. Acknowledging Our Feelings

When we’re facing a difficult situation, it is important to take a moment to acknowledge our emotions without judgment. By noticing and labeling what we’re feeling (“I’m frustrated,” “I’m disappointed,” etc.) and reminding ourselves that it’s perfectly fine to feel this way, we can send a message to our brain and body that we are ok. This simple act of mindfulness can help us process our emotions more effectively.

3. Practicing Self-Compassionate Touch

Physical gestures can have a powerful impact on our emotional states. Placing a hand over our heart, giving ourselves a gentle hug, or resting our hands in our laps with palms up can make a big difference. These small acts can help soothe our nervous systems and create a sense of comfort.

4. Using Affirmations

We can incorporate self-compassionate affirmations into our daily routine. For example:

Writing these affirmations on sticky notes or setting reminders on our phone can help us reinforce them throughout the day.

5. Celebrating Small Wins

Rather than waiting for major achievements to celebrate ourselves, it can be helpful for us to take time to acknowledge and appreciate small victories. Did we complete a task we’d been putting off? Did we take a step toward a goal? It’s important for us to recognize these moments as evidence of our effort and progress. A daily review each evening of small accomplishments from the day can be a good way to keep things top of mind.

6. Setting Realistic Expectations

While it’s great to have goals, it’s advised that we make sure they’re realistic and aligned with our values. It can be helpful to break larger goals into smaller, manageable steps, and give ourselves permission to adjust our plans as needed. Remember, we should aim for progress, not perfection.

7. Engaging in Self-Care

When we engage in self-care, we prioritize activities that nourish our mind, body, and soul. This could include:

The bottom line is: Self-care isn’t selfish; it’s an essential part of maintaining our well-being.

8. Practicing Gratitude

Gratitude and self-compassion go hand in hand. When we take a few moments each day to reflect on what we’re grateful for—both about ourselves and our lives, we can greatly improve our mood.

9. Seeking Support When Needed

Part of being compassionate toward ourselves is recognizing when we need help and reaching out for support. Whether it’s talking to a trusted friend, joining a support group, or seeking therapy, asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness.

Start The New Year Off With A Dose Of Self-Compassion

The beginning of a new year is an opportunity to set the tone for the months ahead. By making self-compassion a priority, we can create a foundation of kindness, resilience, and emotional well-being. Remember, self-compassion is a practice, not a destination. It’s about progress, not perfection. If and when we find ourselves unintentionally being hard on ourselves, we simply need to notice it, forgive ourselves for it, and start over again.

As we navigate the year ahead, try to keep these words in mind: We are worthy of love and kindness, not just from others, but from ourselves. By embracing self-compassion, we can face life’s challenges with strength and grace, making this new year one of growth and self-discovery.

If a little extra support is needed, we are here to help. Reach out to Nashville Psych’s Client Care team for more information or to get started with therapy at clientcare@nashvillepsych.com or giving us a call at (615) 582-2882.